Peek Pic 179

Progress...

Peek Pic 178

Daddy's little lover-face.

Peek Pic 177

Heading out last night to an 80's prom theme party. I'm soooo The Cure.
(Oh, and I'm wearing black and white converse--pants rolled up, of course.)

Sabotage

One of the nice things about my relationship with Tim is that even though our taste in boys men is practically identical, we've never once quarreled over one of them. And trust me, in a town as small as Kansas City, the potential for being interested in the same guy is substantial. But we're both mature adults, and we know our friendship is far more important than some twink a guy with very low boyfriend potential.

Lately, I've been hanging out with someone new. His name is Matt (no, not that Matt). We've only hung out a few times (we rode the motorcycle together yesterday--woohoo), and I think he's a really cool guy. It also doesn't hurt that he's absolutely drop-dead, jaw-dropping, can't-help-but-stare gorgeous. No really, he is. Seriously. So much so that Tim has decided it would be funny to pretend to sabotage my new friendship with him by attempting to make me look bad. As we walked in the door together today, Matt and I found this on the dining room table.

Funny guy, that Tim. But obviously, without a motorcycle, he stands no chance. :)

Supertwins, ACTIVATE

It started as a conversation with Tim about his career aspirations. As a professional artist and graphic designer, he was struggling with how to turn his passion into something that would consistently pay the bills. If any of you out there are artists and/or designers, you know how challenging that can be. As we talked, it was clear that his concern wasn't creating marketable designs, but rather his ability to develop and apply the necessary business principles to turn his talent into profit.

And then we got to thinking...

In my 12+ year career in Product Management, I've developed, launched, marketed and sold three different multi-million dollar lines of business (sadly, for other people's benefit, not my own). And in that capacity, I played an oversight role in all aspects of the business: strategy and planning, operations, finances, HR, marketing, networking/sales, client relationships and vendor management. Executing strategic plans and winning in the sales game is MY passion. Not to mention, I'll soon have quite a bit of free time on my hands once I leave my current job (not to mention the severance).

And then we got to thinking...

What if we combined Tim's "right brain" and inventory of proven designs together with my "left brain" business experience and access to capital? Is it possible that we could pool our core competencies and resources to start our own company?

And then we thought: YES. Yes, indeed.

Busy Busy Busy

My apologies for making last week just a Peek Pic week, but I've been busy. VERY busy, actually. I'll give you just a few of the things I've been working on to see if you can guess what I'm doing:

Establishing Objectives
Deciding on Cash vs. Accrual Method
Researching Markets
Meeting with a Lawyer
Pricing CPAs
Spending (a lot) of Money
Exploring Pricing Models
Booking Travel
Smiling

So who thinks they know??

Peek Pic 176

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Peek Pic 175

Step 2 in Study Remodel. Scale: 1cm=10" Someone check my math!

Peek Pic 174

Brrrrrr.

Peek Pic 173

Decisions, decisions.

Peek Pic 172

Another one of Tim's masterpieces. The lighting doesn't do it justice, but you get the idea.

Now, who wants to buy one?? Bids open at $5000.

Ranom Thoughts #48

--Yesterday I reached out to several of my close co-workers to let them know I would soon be leaving. I was surprised and a little hurt that not one of them called me back. I felt like I was a "dead man walkin'" and all the fellow prisoners were turning their backs on me as I walked to the chamber. Then, this morning by 10am all five of them had either called or e-mailed me. Maybe I'm a little more sensitive to this than I thought.

--Tragedy struck today. I hung my helmet on my right handlebar (as I've done a thousand times), and as I was walking by it, I brushed against it and it fell to the ground. Most experts in the field of cranial impact protection suggest that a drop from that height will render the helmet completely useless in any future high-impact crash. Not being one to want to test that theory, I had to suck it up and buy a new one. Talk about a pricey mistake.

--As soon as I make up my mind on the color scheme, Tim and I are going to redo the upstairs study area. There's lots of work to be done: patching drywall, fixing cracks, painting, installing new lighting, etc. All in anticipation of the delivery of my new desk on January 31. Before and after photos to come when we're finished.

--Everyone I've talked to about my job situation has suggested I take a little mini-vacation just to get away from the stress of thinking about looking for a new job. Honestly, it sounds appealing, but my DNA isn't made up for pure downtime. I'm one of those annoying scuba-diving, hang-gliding, scooter-renting vacationers that feels like I'm wasting opportunities for fun if I just sit a read a book in the sun. That feeling, of course, is completely invalidated if there are hot guys out by the pool.

Oh What a Relief It Is

I don't normally like to talk about work. I figure that we've all got some sort of job woe and that hearing me complain about my job generally isn't all that interesting. Suffice to say, it's been really, really bad for me the last couple of months. New leadership (and I use that term loosely), new direction, new problems. Had it not been for the cast on my leg and the ability to "work" from home, I would've blogged about this two months ago.

My "boss" (who, for the first time in the three months he's been my boss) scheduled a 30-minute face-to-face meeting with me this morning. Here's how it went:

Boss: "So, Dave, what have you been working on lately?"

Me: [Thinking: Nothing, idiot, you've been systematically phasing out the entire Product Management team since you got here and haven't given me the time of day. What the f*ck SHOULD I be working on?] "Mostly Sales stuff, a few client issues. Not much going on at the end of the year."

Boss: I see. Well I'll jump right in to this, then. I've been struggling with what to do with you and your skill set for a couple of months now, and frankly, I'm just having a hard time justifying your position given the maturity of our current product suite.

Me: [Thinking: No shit, idiot, you've been paying me to twiddle my thumbs for a year now.] "I completely understand that, and agree with you 100%."

Boss: "So, unfortunately, Dave, I've decided, reluctantly, to eliminate your position. Based on your six year tenure and your current salary grade, you'll be receiving a very attractive severance package and we'll agree to call this a mutually agreed upon departure. "

Me: [Thinking: FINALLY! I can't believe it took you so long. The ONLY reason I haven't quit is because given my above average performance ratings (top 10% in the company) you'd have to pay me off to get me out of your hair. Handsomely, I might add.] "Well, ____, I certainly respect that decision, and am quite pleased to accept your offer."

Boss: "Dave, I obviously don't know you that well since we haven't worked much together, but you've clearly played a key role in making this business unit a success. Given what I've heard about your talents, it seems as though you'll be much happier and more productive elsewhere. I'm confident this is a win-win for each of us."

Me: [Thinking: You f*cking slimeball. Quit blowing smoke up my ass. The ONLY reason this is a win for you is that you're no longer having to deal with a strong personality that has conflicting opinions on how to run this business. I know this game--and you're losing it.] "Thank you, _____, I appreciate you saying that. And I wish you the best of luck taking over the reigns here." [Thinking: You're gonna need all the luck you can get.]

Boss: "Best of luck to you, too, Dave. [Shakes my hand and we walk to the elevator.] HR will be sending you the paperwork concerning all the details by the end of the week."

Me: "Excellent. Sounds good. Thanks, _____."

And that was it. I walked out, got in my car, and smiled mischievously all the way home. Though I will soon be out of a job, I'm finally off a sinking (and burning) ship with almost six months of severance plus my exercised stock options--the equivalent of another year of my current salary--to give me time to think about the next chapter in my life.

Obviously, I will begin with a ride on the motorcycle. Which, thanks to ____ will soon be fully paid for. God bless corporate America.

Courtesy Court

I was raised in a family where it was considered a mortal sin to eat/drink the last of anything. One never ate the last cookie, or drank the last drop of milk or polished off the ice cream without first seeking approval from someone else in the house. As soon as someone absolved you of the crime of selfishness, you were free to finish it off. Otherwise, you left it there. I can't even imagine how many items spoiled in our refrigerator simply because we were all trying to be overly polite.

This courses through my veins even today. I still get a tad bit offended when I find something missing out of the cabinet without my knowledge, or if I've not acquiesced to its consumption. Obviously, I would never object if I was asked; but my upbringing still seeks to adjudicate the perishables in the court of courtesy. On the flip side, I always ask Tim if I can have the last of something--even if I bought it. It just seems polite. God forbid his craving for the last yogurt exceed that of mine. How could I BE so selfish??

Obviously, Tim has become attuned to this rather absurd habit of mine. This morning I found the following note scrawled on the bag of bagels in which only one plain bagel was left. Tim is clearly an enabler.

Online Trick Eligibility Questionnaire

I had a friend come visit me from Chicago this weekend. We'll call him "Bob." Bob and I have known each other for years, and he visits quite often. When he visits we tend to just lay around, watch movies and catch up. Nothing special has to happen for us to have a good time. One of the things he always does when he's here is hop on Manhunt/Gay.com to see what KC had to offer. You know how it goes: strange town = fresh meat = fun.

Bob is a cute, intelligent and successful 25-year-old and absolutely LOVES older men (40+). The problem is, he's pathologically picky about these men. Not only does he have the typical physical requirements (I don't think I need to describe those here), his gentlemen friends also have to have a very specific personage as it relates to their masculinity, personal hygiene, home decor and career (among others). He only likes VERY butch men who have their shit together. Anything less is a deal breaker.

One of the drawbacks to online chatting is that not all of these requirements are evident, and he apparently isn't all that adept at asking probing questions to assure the person matches his criteria. Because of this, he regularly has several aborted rendezvouses during his visits--each complete with a hilarious story upon his return (I'm trying to convince him to write a book about them. They are usually quite funny).

So Tim and I have decided that Bob needs a better system to avoid these tragic events. Our answer: The Online Trick Eligibility Questionnaire©. Please note, this is specific to Bob only. Individual results may vary.

1. Have you ever inserted anything into your rectum voluntarily?
If answer to #1 is yes, OTEQ is complete. Otherwise, please continue.

2. Do you now or have you ever experienced erectile dysfunction?
3. Do you know the thread-count of your bed sheets?
4. Do you now, or have you ever owned a Pomeranian?
5. Please describe your thoughts on the use of potpourri.
6. Do you now or have you ever plucked your eyebrows?
7. How many times have you used the word "girl" today?
8. Guns-N-Ammo or House Beautiful?
9. Please list your airline and hotel statuses (U.S. only).
10. How many throw pillows are currently on your sofa? Bed?
11. Beer or Cosmopolitan?
12. Have you ever coached an athletic team (excluding cheer leading)?
13. Have you ever modified a pair a jeans?
14. What do you wear to the gym, an outfit or sweats?
15. Have you ever started a sentence with "Back in Nam?"
16. Who likes you better, your nieces or your nephews?
17. Have you ever cried during an episode of Divine Design?
18. Axe or D&G?
19. Have you ever held a job where a tool belt was required?
20. Have you ever peed sitting down?

Customized OTEQs are available upon request for a modest consulting fee. Orgasm not guaranteed.

Peek Pic 171

I sooo got that little old lady's spot.

The Big Reveal

The YouTube thumbnail gives away my surprise, so all you're getting is a link. Thanks for watching!

Rapture

Do you remember the first time you had REALLY good sex? Or the first time you ate a meal at a 5-star restaurant? How about that perfect haircut? Or favorite movie, or song? It wasn't that you hadn't had prior experiences in these things, it was just that you didn't know what you were missing until perfection presented itself to you. And when it did--lawd have mercy child--you were transformed.

Today, I had one of these experiences.

Tomorrow, I'll tell you about it.

Cast Off

In an unexpected turn of events today, I had the cast on my foot removed. I suppose I should be thrilled about this, but honestly, I'm wondering if it was the right decision. Since it's really been hurting me the last two weeks, I was prepared for another 30 days of being plastered (and not in the good way).

Now that it's off and it still feels just about the same as when I first went in, I'm not all that confident this is going to be over any time soon. However, I've got no credible reason to question his medical expertise (save the intense pain still in my ankle), so I'll dutifully follow his advice and continue to use crutches for another week, then gradually start to put increased pressure on it. I go back in three weeks for a check up. Cross your fingers for me.

Now where's my freakin' helmet? :)

Everyone's Got a Soapbox These Days

Tonight, I stumbled upon this from an otherwise hilarious blogger I previously held in high esteem. I just couldn't resist offering my unsolicited criticism:

"Your motivation to educate those that don't necessarily need an education about how HIV affects you comes across as grandstanding. And I couldn't help but cringe at your characterization of the disease through a single study with [unqualified] statistics.

Your story is poorly researched, riddled with unnecessarily dramatic metaphors, and completely mischaracterizes the current state of HIV disease management. Your intellectual laziness and tendency for the dramatic has done a disservice to everyone that reads it.

If you'd really like to educate others about HIV disease (or at least enough to speak intelligently about it), I recommend getting to know as many affected/infected individuals as you can. HIV is all around you (probably much more than you know), and if you took the time to embrace it (rather than avoiding "that area of the bar"), I think you'd find things to be much more optimistic than how you've characterized it above.

Otherwise, you're just perpetuating the doom and gloom that shames this disease into the back of our community's consciousness. And I bet even a misinformed bystander can appreciate how that might foster the continued spread of the disease.

Shame on you."

Just had to get that off my chest. Carry on.

2007 "To Do" List

I mentioned earlier this month that I was putting together a list of things I'd like to accomplish in the upcoming year, either for personal growth or just plain fun. I promise to share each of them with you as I check off the list. The pressure of all of you looking over my shoulder will definitely help me do them.

1. Take a weekend camping trip.
2. Attend at least two cultural events.
3. Take an overnight road trip on the motorcycle.
4. Go on three consecutive dates with the same person.
5. Redecorate my upstairs office area.
6. Go on a job interview.
7. Reconnect with two lost friends.
8. Write something and have it published.
9. Go skinny dipping.
10. Attend a class to learn something new.

2006 Highlights

Joys
--Bought and fell in love with my first motorcycle (love affair still going strong).
--Rekindled my friendship with Tim.
--Got Invisalign teeth aligners to eliminate my cross-bite and straighten my teeth.
--Overhauled the look and feel of my bedroom, still enjoying the zen-like comfort.
--Bought a new camera and found making short videos was a fun new hobby.
--Learned how to find and watch a practically endless supply of adult entertainment.
--Upgraded my home wireless network to the new, superfast "n" standard.
--Spent a lot of quality time with my family.

Regrets
--Reluctantly but necessarily forfeited a few friendships.
--Fractured a bone in my foot. Still still trying to get it to heal after six months.
--Developed an increasing level of job dissatisfaction. Considering changes in '07.
--Witnessed the extreme ups and downs of my parents' health.
--Hosted a selfish and inconsiderate house guest with two large dogs.
--Had a young friend die unexpectedly.
--Went on dismally few dates. No sparks.

Cheers to everyone for a fantastic 2007. And a special "thank you" to everyone that stops by and takes a peek into my life. I look forward to sharing many more joys (and regrets) with you in 2007!

Happy New Year!!