Thank you, MLK

The principles of non-violence asserts that power depends on the cooperation of others, and that through the withdrawal of this co-operation, power is usurped. Martin Luther King, Jr. used principles of non-violence to disrupt social injustices put in place by the powerful majority. And as I drove into work this morning, I got to thinking about his achievements and wondered why the gay community doesn't have our own leader or uniter to help us with our issues.

I can't speak for others, and I won't pretend I have a handle on all of the gay social issues. But from my perspective (and I suspect this applies to most of us), I think there are two clear-cut reasons why we haven't yet sought out a figure like MLK to help with our social ills:

1) we don't suffer all that much
2) we're generally content

Historically, groups that have fought, literally and figuratively, for social change have suffered immensely. And by suffering, I mean institutionalized, across-the-board physical, economic, and/or religious suffering to name just a few. As a gay man, I can't relate to that. Sure, I appreciate that some gay men occasionally get beat up by rednecks, or scoffed at for holding hands, or even called a "fag" here and there. But as a whole, I feel like we're well integrated into society (or at least I am). I don't sit on the back of the bus. I haven't had my standards of living compromised. I haven't been enslaved, or blacklisted, or been denied an education or a right to vote. Truth be told, I don't feel like I have it so bad. But maybe that's just me.

I think this leads us to point number two: I'm content. Because I don't feel like I suffer great social injustice, I've quietly allowed militant AIDS activists, drag queens and go-go boys at Gay Pride events to represent me by proxy. Even worse, I haven't shown any support to the surrepititious and vague representation from groups like the "Human Rights Campaign." When a state votes for gay rights, I think "cool." When a state votes against gay rights, I think "bummer." This is hardly social activism. I wonder: How many other reasonably successful, well-integrated gay men feel the same way? I suspect a lot.

Leaders for social change aren't born, but rather summoned from the throws of suffering. And this is why I think the gay community doesn't have a leader--because we don't universally suffer. Granted, in some places we can't marry, in some places we can't visit our partner in the ICU, and in some cases, we get passed over for promotions or jobs. But I would characterize those as inconveniences, not true suffering like those before us.

So on this day, I will celebrate MLK--and Mahatma Ghandi, Dorthy Day, Cesar Chavez and Lech Welesa to name just a few--not for what they did for their respective social issues, but what they did for all of us. Thanks to their struggles, I live in a place where on the whole, tolerance for suffering is becoming extinct. And that to these leaders, especially MLK, I'm not universally judged by who I love, or what I do in my bedroom, but by the content of my character. And on this special day, I'll be certain not to take that for granted.