Thursday, June 15, 2006

My Favorite Sport

It's a lazy Saturday afternoon and you're incredibly horny bored. With nothing to do, you hop online head down to the lake to see if you can find any action. You know the chat room lake doesn't have many hot guys fish in it, but it's nice to sit around in your underwear be outside and relax--a great way to pass the time. And who knows, you might even get laid catch your dinner.

If you're going to reel in the big ones, you've got to make sure you have the right gear. You'll need a profile cane pole and some slutty pictures bait. Obviously, the profile cane pole is much less important than the slutty pictures bait. In fact, you need to make sure that you change the slutty pictures bait continuously. Otherwise, the hot guys fish will pass right by you. Remember, the hot guys fish are dumb as a box of rocks pretty crafty; sometimes you have to work hard to lay catch them.

Once you've got all that taken care of, drop your profile line into a local chat room the water and wait. Right off the bat, you're going to get some private messages bites from some really nasty trolls carp. Do NOT chat with them reel these in, trust me. Patience is the name of the game here. To pass the time, you might consider downloading some porn reading a book, getting naked on cam needlepoint, or even cruising another sex site having some refreshing lemonade. Be careful: Don't get lube on the keyboard drop your book in the water!

Since you're not a complete slut a responsible angler, you're going to practice what's called catch and release. You will more than likely chat with reel in several guys fish over the course of an afternoon, but that doesn't mean you've got to f*ck keep every one of them. Hell, that's just too tiring. The key is to trade XXX pictures look them over closely to make sure you're getting the hottest best tasting, most hung fattest stud fish you can find. Nobody likes to have to kick out throw away a trick fish after you've put all that effort into getting him there cleaning and getting him naked battering it.

So next time you're horny bored, try fishing. It's my favorite sport!


At 2:08 PM, Blogger KipEsquire said...

All I can say is:

"You're gonna need a bigger boat..."


At 3:52 PM, Blogger Sorted Lives said...

Thank was fucking hysterical. Thanks for the laugh -- and I needed it!!

At 7:03 AM, Anonymous ThatGuy said...

Okay - that was by far the most creative and outright funny blog post I have read in a long time.

At 4:45 PM, Blogger Hot Toddy said...

I need some help baiting my hook. That part is the hardest.


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