Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Corporate Tip of the Day

When (not if) you are invited to a meeting in the Executive Conference Room, and the blinds are drawn and the whole team is there and the Executive du jour nervously cracks his/her knuckles while explaining the rationale behind the "realignment" and how your former boss has regrettably resigned (but thanks him for all his hard work) and how this is going to make us stronger and better and faster and that we're all going to be better off for it, there are only TWO appropriate reactions:

Nodding and smiling. That's it.

Do not ask questions. Do not open your mouth. If you are called on to speak, make sure you say something positive. If possible, restate what the Executive du jour has just said. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT voice your opinion on any subject. No one cares, especially the Executive du jour. This meeting is just a formality--it's too late. Don't bother. You're not going to fix ANYTHING. Just sit there and SHUT UP. Your colleagues don't want you to look like a complete asshole while you commit career suicide. Especially me. It's ugly. Really ugly.

Now let's go out there and WIN!!! Yay team!


At 5:42 PM, Blogger MiKell said...

Thank the gods.

For a minute there, I thought you were giving yourself advice, you know, after the fact.


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