The Devil Wears a Helmet

Angel on Right Shoulder: I am so proud of you, Dave, for purchasing such a practical, fuel efficient mode of transportation.

Devil on Left Shoulder: You're a f*cking PUSSY. Who wants to be fuel efficient? You gotta look COOL!

Angel: Don't listen to him, Dave. He's insecure and seeks only selfish pleasures in life.

Devil: Yeah, like going fast and getting laid!

Angel: Dave, take pride in how sensible you are being. You're helping the environment.

Devil: People are going to laugh at you. Get a MOTORCYCLE. Be a MAN! You looked so GOOD in that black motorcycle jacket. Do you really want to tell people you ride a "scoooooter?" You big sissy.

Angel: Life isn't just about satisfying your own desires, Dave. Think of your fellow man.

Devil: F*ck your fellow man, it still gets 60mpg. And this way, you don't have to wear a dress when you ride!


10 minutes later:

Vera at ScooterWorld: Hello, Scooter World. How can I help you?

Dave: Vera, it's Dave. I've got some bad news for you. I've changed my mind...

More to come, stay tuned.