Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Random Thoughts #48 (Holiday Annoyances)

--My brother calls one of his sons "Matthew Buddy." I'm not really sure why he feels so compelled to add "Buddy" every time he speaks his name. I wonder if Matthew minds, because it drives me absolutely crazy. I hope at one point Matthew will be able to set boundaries with him and get him to cut that shit out.

--My mother has a habit of expressing love by doing things for people. Making you a sandwich, handing you the remote, and fetching the newspaper are all tools in her arsenal of love. Normally this isn't so bad, but if you're on crutches, the pestering never stops. I finally had to sit her down and ask her to stop being so relentless with her offers to help. I think I hurt her feelings a bit, but it was a nice adjustment to the rest of my trip.

--I bought my Dad a Harmony 880 Universal Remote for Christmas after he complained about all the remotes he had to juggle. I spent almost four hours setting it up and teaching him how to use it. He ranted and raved about it all day long. Then last night I heard him watching TV around 2am (he doesn't sleep very well) and got up to get a drink of water. As I walked back into the bedroom, I noticed he had his old remote in his hand. *sigh*

--It seems like the only thing my family is capable of talking about at Christmas dinner are things that make the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end: George W. Bush, the war, how wonderful Joel Osteen is, blah blah blah. I felt bad, but as soon as I cleared my plate, I excused myself. They know my opinions differ on these issues, but seem to not recognize that it makes me uncomfortable. Next Christmas, I'm going to invite a friend (sorry guys, he asked first!) and we're going to talk about poppers and fisting.

--My parents love to offer unsolicited advice. Which also happens to be one of my biggest pet peeves. Examples of my parents advice: the best cold/flu medicine, the best instant peach-flavored tea, the best shows on TV, the worst brand of cinnamon rolls, the most efficient nighttime heat temperature, the most effective vitamin combination. Honestly, I'm not sure how I live without this information...


7 Comments:

At 7:48 PM, Blogger Sorted Lives said...

Are you sure we are not related. I swear we are -- except, well, if your dad watches TV with the volume up to 60, then we are!

 
At 7:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Next Christmas, I'm going to invite a friend and we're going to talk about poppers and fisting.

I totally want to be that friend. And I'll pay my own way.

 
At 8:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

your comments made me even happier i didn't go home for christmas again this year (year 4). my brother has dropped my nephew's name altogether, he is simply "buddy." where does it come from?!

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger Michael Guy said...

I have not been home for Christmas since 1990. That was the year my mom prepared a 'turkey loaf' for Christmas dinner along with over-cooked broccoli and Stove Top stuffing. I spent $500 in airfare for that? Not funny! BTW: every holiday trip home I invariably returned to my condo and immediately gave myself a "SILKWOOD" shower to cleanse myself of all their bullshit advice and meddling!

 
At 6:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Next Christmas, I'm going to invite a friend (sorry guys, he asked first!) and we're going to talk about poppers and fisting.

Nobody knows that because MY COMMENT NEVER GOT APPROVED!!!!

;) - LOL!!!

 
At 6:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Best cold rememdy = Zicam. Ha!

 
At 9:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fine. Now, I TOTALLY look like an ass. And nobody knows.

 

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