Friday, March 24, 2006

On corporate atmosphere, admins and apostrophes

The culture in our office is very late-nineties software-company-chic. To keep the old-school corporate hierarchy bullshit to a minimum, we all have identical fancy-schmancy Herman Miller cubes--no offices. The mail clerk has the same desk/cube setup as the VP. Only the CEO and several other "privacy-focused" staff have their own space. I like this about our company.

The other interesting but frustrating thing about the company is that no one has administrative assistants. I can't tell you how many countless and pointless hours I spend on copying, stapling, doing expense reports, booking my own travel, scheduling my own meetings and filling out ridiculous report templates
. There are four Directors in my group, and we all sit together. I can only imagine that if you added up the collective hours we each spend doing all this crap and multiplied it by our collective salaries, we could afford an ARMY of clerical support staff. I have no idea why they don't do that. Who's in charge around here? (not me, thank god).

On a totally unrelated note: When I first joined the company, I used to sit directly across from the poorly-named "Lactation Room." At the time, there were two recent mothers that would enter the room and pump the milk from their breasts. [I think I need to go back and add this to my list.] Needless to say, it grossed me out. Completely and totally grossed me out. Sometimes I could hear things. Strange things that gay men aren't meant to hear...

Yesterday as I was walking around in my old area I noticed that the sign had been changed.
It's now the "Mother's Room." And noticed that the cube across was now a storage space for marketing materials and books.

The only problem with this new sign, of course, is that MY mother (singular) doesn't work here. And since they intend to service all of the mothers (plural) here in the office, the correct punctuation for this room (plural possessive) would, in fact, be "Mothers' Room." Now, I'm not perfect--there are hundreds of errors (I'm sure) contained within this blog (and probably within this post). But if you're going to make a friggin SIGN to be permanently affixed to the walls of a corporate office, shouldn't you consult an authoritative source? Maybe, like, a 6th grade English book? Scary...


At 7:00 PM, Blogger MiKell said...

Remind me to never, NEVER, apply for a job in your company.

I'm afraid I wouldn't make it very far.

And don't let your company HR department talk to mine. They might get ideas.
Actually, I'd probably be okay. My CEO has figured out how to make his own coffee, but he'll never lower himself to program his own cell phone.

He has me for that.

At 9:39 AM, Blogger Phil said...

Give the fact that you've bought an Idiot's Guide to London, I assume you plan on coming over at some point? Your head will explode with the extremely poor use of apostrophes on signs in this city, esp. hand written ones.

It seems that apostrophes are considered OK for plurals...and this country supposed to be the cradle of the English language!

You've been warned! ;-P

At 9:50 AM, Blogger Dave said...

I'll be willing to overlook the apostrophe issue if someone can get me a date with Kristian Digby.

Now THAT'S a reason to go to London!


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